Once the butterflies have worn off with someone you are interested in, how do you then keep him around?  The best way is to show him that even though you are not perfect, you are being yourself.  Besides being yourself, you should be nurturing his ability to truly appreciate you so that he becomes more inclined to commit.

Understand what he wants and needs

If you pay close attention to his wants and needs, you can tailor your affection to meet those needs.  For example, if he wants an independent woman who does not cling, then cooking him meals every night and smothering him actually won’t help that type of man.  So you need to pay attention to his unique love language and cater to that.  Once he feels loved he is going to be better able to shower you with the affection you want as well.

Positive vibes keep him happy

If you man craves praise and wants some verbal affection, be sure to be forthcoming with that.  If he feels you appreciate what he does, he will do it more.  So make sure to praise him and say thank you often so he clearly knows how much you appreciate having him in your life.  Don’t just talk, be sure to follow through with actions that back up your words too.  Another pointer is to give him quality time especially if this is important to him.  For example, if he hates to watch television then be sure to set time aside for him where you can do activities that do not involve just sitting around.  Try some sports or other active adventures, even if it’s just going for a hike in the outdoor.

Do things that clearly show you care

Men don’t want words they actually want action as well.  If you can express your affection in concrete ways he will certainly take note.  Do not overwhelm him however do show him you care.  A tiny gift which doesn’t even cost  anything, something as simple as homemade cookies or fixing a sandwich can go a long way to showing him that you love him.  Simple acts of service like cooking or doing a favor or chore will be appreciated.  Never do so much that you grow to resent doing him favors.  Don’t become his housekeeper, cook, or financier.  Instead, do small thoughtful things that do not interfere with his sense of independence.  It really doesn’t have to be much, so long as it is noticeable.

Physical affection

Physical affection is the biggie!  Men need it, they thrive on it, they love it, and if they don’t get it for an extended period of time they are going to go looking elsewhere.  So be sure that you can show him some love both verbally and physically.  Hug him, kiss him, give him a really good back rub every now and then.  Men crave a woman’s physical touch more than you know.   Just gauge how much closeness he seems to crave and do overdo it.

Give him space

Of course six month into a relationship you want to feel like you are his girlfriend but honestly speaking, pushing the relationship or spearheading the effort to define its boundaries, will backfire.  Instead, gauge what he is doing, and respond accordingly.  If he is non-committal then you can back away, and if he comes around, then you explain why but only because he sought to talk to you.  If it’s you pushing the need to talk he is going to feel smothered.  Instead of pushing the relationship, it is better to merely observe it is going nowhere and take actions to protect your emotions accordingly. If he is trying to talk to you and understand where you are coming from, it is preferable than you chasing him down for conversations about relationship status.

Some men use the need to space to be players and pursue multiple relationships while keeping all their options over.  You can tell this when he has blacked out weekends or you can’t even pin him down for plans that stick.  This is a player who is not interested in a relationship and it’s always best to move on.  If he wants you to keep you around he will come knocking within a couple of months.

On the other hand, some guys like to do their buddy stuff and you need to give him plenty of space for that.  If you have your own social life and activities that do not revolve around him, it can make it easier to give him the appropriate amount of space.  Don’t blow off your girlfriends for a man.

Believe in him

If you want to be a good girlfriend to him, you need to support him and his ambitions. You need to believe in him. Even though he may do things slower or differently from what you want, you need to avoid mothering and smothering him. You want to get along with his mother, but not be his mother. Even if he needs a push to get things done, try not to being a nag because he will certainly resent it. Let him know once or twice, but give him the benefit of the doubt. If you harangue him about things he will grow resistant and reticent. If you stay upbeat and positive it increases the change he take care of things because he wants to help and please you.

Develop compatible interests

A man who love to travel, is going to be with a girl who also loves to travel. So when you date him, be sure to understand what his interest are and make sure you can deal with it before you get seriously involved. It is hard to fake interests that you have no interest in. For example, if he wants a girlfriend who is into golf and you despise golf it’s an issue. If you are a foodie, and he can’t stand the sight of an expensive restaurant its a problem.

Screening for men that suit your interests well is key to finding the right man. However, no man is going to have the exact same interests that you do. Once you find that you want to be with him, it can help to nurture some common interests. If all he wants to do is sit and party and watch sports on television, you could always get some sports tickets and invite him out to events. This can combine his interest in sports with your interest in going out with other couples and having fun. Try to find compromise because if you two have plenty of common interests it will lead to compatibility. Even if he sees you trying to share interests he will appreciate it. Remember, that he isn’t really interested in shopping when you drag him to the mall either.

If you want to keep your man interested, be kind to him and show him that he is special. Relationships involve give and take and some sacrifice of personal time. Make him feel comfortable and try giving more and showing him you care. It starts with looks and intrigue but who you are as a person helps keep his interest in the long run. A man wants to feel most of all, like a girl has his back in life. Good luck!

Keep him interested

© 2012 Seduction Meaning