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Men are only going to treat you with the respect you demand, not what you deserve
Men are only going to treat you with the respect you demand, not what you deserve. This is why it is so important for a woman to have strong relationship boundaries. Act with integrity. Expect and demand the same honesty, trust and integrity from him. Hold him accountable for his actions and do not become a pushover in fear that you will lose him if you stand up for yourself. You can be feminine and soft, and still demand respect. The combination of remaining soft spoken, while standing firm for what you believe in will create attraction and inspire his love and devotion.
Have you ever been the woman that he dated just before getting serious about somebody and wondered what you did wrong. Did you ask why did he commit to her and not me? It may be that he evolved and grew over time with you and that you became a stepping stone or transitory phase of his moving on to something real. You may not have been a perfect fit for him. This can be as arbitrary as you do not live in close proximity, you don’t fit the physical characteristics that he is inherently attracted to, or he just doesn’t see your two lives as fitting together naturally and seamlessly.
If you were with him for a long time for example months into years, he obviously did care about you but refused to commit. One of the main reasons he may have refused is that you did not demand a commitment. If you did not demand a commitment he would be loathe to give you one especially if the relationship status quo is OK with him. Maybe he is keeping his options open and one foot out the door. The problem is that you allowed the pattern to establish itself over time. He knows he can continue because you’ve already lowered your self respect to accept it in the first place. Men will do whatever you tolerate.
The next woman who came along may have refused, literally refused to tolerate poor behavior from him. If he wasn’t willing to be exclusive and monogamous, she wasn’t in the game. If he wasn’t going to change his status on Facebook and include her in his social circles, she wasn’t going to be part of his life. So she may have done literally nothing to deserve his commitment insofar as loyalty. She just benefits and steals your hard work. In fact, you are the one who did more to deserve his commitment because you hung in there with him waiting patiently for so long. But will he commit because you waited? No its the opposite he won’t commit because you waited.
Deep down you may have known that if you demanded a commitment he would have opted out. So since you didn’t want to lose him you chose to wait hoping he would evolve to wanting a commitment over time. This usually does not happen however. She on the other-hand took no prisoners. She was willing to not be with him at all, unless he committed. So since he had literally no choice and no gray zone to conveniently slip into, he committed. If you think about it long enough, the fact that she refused to compromise made her value higher in his eyes. If I want her, I am going to have to this, this and this. So he goes into her maze willingly and starts jumping through her hoops and obstacles. This is a woman who respects herself so I am therefore going to respect her, he concludes. She’s worth it.
Always remember, that the woman who deserves is respect his often the women who does not get his respect at all. The woman who demands his respect on the other hand, reigns supreme. If you want him to treat you with respect, then demand it. You may not get him acquiesce, but you will save yourself so much heartbreak and wasted time getting strung along as an option in go-nowhere relationships. Demand respect and have no-nonsense approach to radically rejecting poor behavior. Do that, and you’ll be the woman that gets the guy – the woman that men love.
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